The past few weeks have been heavy again. Not in the dramatic sense, just the kind that slowly creeps in, the kind that makes you question everything you are doing.
I have been thinking a lot about mental health lately and how important it is to pause. To take a step back and remember that we are human first, business owners second. The world does not stop if we rest.
For me, grounding usually happens through connection, and most of all, through my sister. She is far away, but distance does not really matter when someone just gets you. I can send her a random voice note on a Tuesday, half laughing, half crying, and she does not need the full story. She just knows. She is my anchor. The person who reminds me who I am when the noise gets too loud.
And honestly, that is what this season has been about, surrounding myself with the right people. The ones who see you for who you are. Who do not take advantage of your kindness or twist your words. Because when your mental health wobbles, the wrong people can make it ten times worse. I had a few tough weeks that made me doubt myself, my art, even my purpose. It is wild how one bad client or one toxic interaction can plant that seed of doubt.
But then, life being what it is, two of my repeat clients came back. Women I have photographed before, who trust me, who bring nothing but warmth and good energy into a space. And they reminded me, in their own quiet way, that I am not the problem.
The problem is the wrong clients, the ones who do not match our energy. The ones who try to bulldoze their way through boundaries, make everything about them, and drain the joy from what we do. The ones who mistake your empathy for weakness. But they forget something important. We are not alone. Behind every small business owner is an army, a support system, a family, a legal team, a community. We are not just a name on Instagram. We are people who have worked hard to build something real, and we have every right to protect it.
So yes, I will rest when I need to. I will take breaks. I will lean on my sister and my small circle. And I will keep creating for the people who truly value what I do, the ones who see the heart behind the work. Yes, money matters. I would be lying if I said otherwise.
But so do my wellbeing, my mood, and the energy I bring to my children. This year has been a lesson in balance, in learning that financial goals mean nothing if I am running on empty. Moving into next year, I am keeping my goals, but with a little more polish and a lot more boundaries.
I will not ignore the red flags anymore.
I will think with my head, not just my heart or my art.
And I will make decisions with both passion and protection in mind.
Because here is the truth. I have built something I am incredibly proud of. A business born from love, creativity, and care. My Google reviews reflect the trust and kindness that my clients and I share. But I also know how fragile that is. It only takes one wrong person, one bad review, to shake years of hard work. And I am not willing to let that happen.
So I will lean on my legal team, my family, my community, my small army of support. I will do whatever I need to do to protect my peace, my art, and the safe space I have built for my clients. Because the wrong people, the ones who bulldoze boundaries, twist stories, or try to drain your light, they forget that business owners are not alone. We are not easy targets. We are not weak for being kind. We have support systems, networks, and a strength they will never understand.
As a woman on the spectrum, living with ADHD and anxiety, I carry my emotions differently. I think before I speak. I overthink, sometimes to protect others more than myself. I am always aware that words hold weight, and that for people like me, a single harsh word can send you spiralling into a deep, dark place. That is the side of entrepreneurship no one likes to talk about.
Mental health is not just a buzzword, it is a lifeline. According to a UK study by Simply Business, 56 percent of small business owners experienced poor mental health in the past year, and 1 in 10 have contemplated suicide. Those numbers are devastating, and they show how much pressure we are under to hold everything together, to keep smiling, keep posting, keep serving, even when we are falling apart. But here is what I am learning. I do not owe anyone my peace.
Yes, I want to grow. Yes, I care about money, I am building something for my children after all. But not at the expense of my wellbeing. Not if it means losing the love I have for what I do.
So next year, I am choosing differently. I will keep the goals. Keep the drive.
But I will also keep my boundaries firm.
Because my art, my energy, and my peace, they are worth protecting!!
Always with Love,
Deborah xxx
